day 1

Posted on by violeteye in Thoughts

it was 16th july 2005, a day after my supervisor assigned me to submit
a 5000-word reading of one of the films i am working on my dissertation
in one week’s time.

he gave me his instructions in such a rigorous manner and infected me
with so much enthusiasm that i walked out of his room feeling
unbelievably fierce. [insert images of mel gibson from that braveheart
film] i felt like i could topple anything that comes my way. i felt
like i could crush anyone’s bones only with my bare hands.

but that didn’t last long.

the minute i got on the bus, i felt like there was something really
really wrong. 5000 words? 1 week? but i barely wrote 4000 words for my
previous essays and for those i was given 2 weeks!

by the time i got home, i was hopeless. i fukkin knew it – i was bloody
tricked! and right at that moment, i felt fiercely toppled and crushed
right to the bones.

so, it was 16th july 2005 and i got up from sleep feeling incredibly
exhausted i almost believed i needed another 8-hour sleep. after a few
minutes of mentally kicking my own arse, i finally dragged myself to
the kitchen and fixed some breakfast. i went back to my room and stared
at the computer. i stared and stared. seriously, i had never stared at
something for that long. i also remember shuddering at some point. i glanced at the
calendar and shuddered even more.

it was torture.

a half-smoked pack of cigarettes came into my view. it had the alice-in-wonderland-ish label LIT ME.

so i lit one. i felt a little better. i felt like i could finally grab that horrid book and start reading.

yes, it was 16th july 2005, the day the wave of stress hit the shores of my mind for the nth time.

Published by violeteye

Gratiagusti Chananya Rompas was born in Jakarta, 19 August 1979. She studied English Literature in Universitas Indonesia, Depok (2003) and received her masters in The Gothic Imagination from University of Stirling, Scotland (2005). She is one of the founders of Komunitas BungaMatahari, a mailing list-based Indonesian poetry community that have embraced many poetry enthusiasts with its catchphrase “semua bisa berpuisi” or, roughly translated, “poetry for all”. She is also involved in Selatan, a literary journal, and Paviliun Puisi, a monthly open mic event--both managed by her and her like-minded friends. She currently resides in Jakarta, trying to find balance between writing and day-to-day living.

30 thoughts on “day 1”

  11. hmmm..tanggal 27 (>_<)*konsentrasi melihat masa depan...
    …kayanya gw lagi nongkrong beli bakso di Blok M tuh… (i hope) :P

    huehuee…emgnya belom pernah mudik juga?…

    btw…sirik!pengen liat scotland juga…..

    Reply

  16. hahahaha…tenang. entar sekalinya pulang..huiiii…sensasinya itu loh ;P….
    emg dah brapa lama gak menghirup udara indo?….

    ttg scotland trip…ditunggu tour de'graveyardnya (^_^)..& kalo bisa, makhluk Loch Ness-nya disuruh nongol yah… ;))….

    Reply

  20. …berarti dikau masih punya 21 bulan lagi buat memecahkan rekor belom pernah mudik gw ^_^…hihihihihi…c'mon, anya..u can do it!!….

    *kabur menghindari lemparan batu2 graveyard…..

    Reply

  28. hahaha.. iya yah? mungkin krn potongan rambutnya ya – padahal gak pernah bilang ke tukang potongnya,”tolong dipotong kyk tiar, ya.” bahkan gue ga terlalu mendeskripsikan maunya gmana selain minta dibanyakin layernya. mungkin tukang potongnya rada psychic – tau kalo gue temenan sama tiar. anyhow, gpp juga sih dibilang mirip si butet satu itu – toh temen sendiri ini. :P

    Reply

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