Log #21

i was a vampire, running away from my flock for reasons i now can’t remember. i flew and flew above the city’s streets and highways, alarming people along the way. the strange thing was, they frightened me too and i didn’t think i wanted even a drop of their blood. i attempted to fly higher but failed. i wasn’t sure whether it was because of the wind or vampires were never built to fly above a certain altitude.

not long after, i was flying above a small avenue. i tried to hide in a tree but i always slipped and made myself exposed to the passersby below. to protect myself, i put on a threatening face and i could see as well as feel the fear in their faces, even under the helmets of motorcyclists.

while i was struggling with the stupid tree, i saw a military truck drove by on my side of the street. sitting on the back was a handsome officer who could pass for a movie star and he smiled at me. i was so amazed – there was this human being who wasn’t scared of me and i wasn’t scared of him either. i felt almost in love.

i don’t remember what happened next. all i know i was in my room, tears on my face, holding on to the door to defend it from the attack of my fellow vampires. i was losing for its bolts had been disengaged and i could see archaic hands reaching from behind the trembling door.

i jumped again to a different scene. this time i was running on a pedestrian walk with a boy. i think he looked like M but i remember his face kept changing. we carried duffel bags and at some point we dropped the bags and ran without them. but only after a few steps, we fell over on the pavement.

my friend pointed out to me a sign on the shop in front of us that said “scratch to model”, which meant if you wanted to work as a model you have to scratch several panels on the door, which looked like those things you need to scratch on your mobile phone vouchers.  i remembered thinking i needed the money badly so i stood up and began scratching.

then we saw people searching our bags. i stopped scratching and we ran quickly to stop them. i saw my friend’s bag was already empty.

the next thing i knew i was either having sex or had just had sex with my boyfriend. as it is in all my dreams so far, sex is never graphic.

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